ARMY: “Follow me, you maggots!” shouted the drill sergeant, and they did, leaving the food more edible.

CHILDREN’S ENTERTAINMENT: “Oh gosh, my suit is giving me just the hugest rash!” said Barney, over-delivering on the gift of sharing.

HOLLYWOOD REBOOT: Dorian Gray looks great. But on a forgotten phone in his ex-girlfriend’s cupboard is an increasingly rough-looking sext.

DOMESTIC DRAMA: Aggressive passion to passive agression.

LIFE COACHING: Before committing to self-actualisation, do a quick check as you might already actually be yourself.

GENDER SWAPPED JAMES BOND FILM: Octopenis.

TRIBAL MYTH: Primitive people believe that you're stealing a piece of their soul when you photograph of one of their federal buildings.

ASTROLOGY QUIZ: Every sign is linked to particular characteristics, so this simple quiz can predict your sign! 1) What’s your birthday?

POP PSYCH: Random questions can have deep and revealing answers. For instance, If you ask me what superpower I’d like, I'd say the USSR.

SCIENCE: Brain parasites can make ants climb grass blades. Tequila makes people climb on tables. Tequila, with a worm in it. Coincidence?