Domestic Drama: "You are my rock," he told her. Picturing a trapped arm and a penknife.


Myth: You WOULDN'T steal JEWELS. You WOULDN'T steal GOLD. Taking FIRE from the GODS is STEALING. SAY NO TO FIRE-SHARING!


Myth: Sisyphus sat writing at a desk in Hell. His attention kept slipping to the browser again, and again, and again.


Porn: A chiseled delivery guy appeared at the door. No one had ordered pizza, but the ladies weren't going to turn down a Deus Sex Machina.


Theology: The world was made in 6 days. On the geological timescale that's a last-minute rush before a deadline. Which explains everything.


War: "I'll break you down, and build you back up from the rubble!" screamed the drill sergeant. Which naturally led to some unstable houses.


Sport: The chess grand master found one of his knights in his bed. The next day, he threw the game. The Sicilian Defence never fails.


Spiritual: "You dream of horses every night," said the guru, and the skeptic became a disciple, forgetting he'd posted that on his blog.


Political: Men with bagged heads were forced to sit through the 1st graders singing Abba. 3 confessed. It was an Extraordinary Rendition.


Business: A few years ago he'd been a simple banker. Now, with champagne in hand, he looked down on the rioters below. From Zero to Nero.